Candide's Two Girlfriends

Candide's Two Girlfriends

by David Bruce

NOOK Book(eBook)


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For Adults Only. No violence. Some humor. Explicit sex. Male fantasy.

Chapter 1: Betty and Vicky Meet Candide.

Times were tough, economically and politically and socially, and Betty and Vicky were on the streets, and not by choice. Why would two women be on the streets if they had another, warmer place—with food—to be. Still, they had each other. What they had previously had was bad boyfriends, bad friends, and bad bars. But they were problem-solvers, and they were prepared to solve their problems the way that many women in their circumstances do: by starting a small business in public relations, also known as prostitution.

Walking toward them was a man they knew by sight, someone who had lived in the area for many years, someone who was single and sometimes thought to be gay, someone who had a job, and someone who did not have a bad reputation, perhaps caused by having little reputation at all, due to a quiet and gentle and shy nature. If he wasn’t gay, he might be willing to sleep with one of both of them—for money, of course.

Before he reached them, another woman—much older than Betty and Vicky—approached him and begged: “Sir, I have three kids to feed. Can you help us?” The man shrugged, then reached into a pocket and pulled out some paper money. He hesitated and then gave her a $20 bill. This was a lot of money to her, and she was happy to get it, but she asked, “Can you please give more, sir?” She thought, I usually have to beg much harder than this to get even $1. Most people give nothing. Of course, most people can afford to give only a little or nothing. He gave me a lot, and maybe I can get a little more. The man shrugged again, and then he gave her a $5 bill. Twenty-five dollars was the result of a normal day’s begging to the woman, and she was happy and said, “Bless you, sir.” She meant it, and she really did have three children.

Betty and Vicky watched this transaction silently, and they did not approach the man. But they did follow him to his home, which was modest. He was hardly rich, but he was frugal. He had no debt except for a credit card that he paid off each month. In hard economic and social times, a person with a job and no debt is sometimes considered rich—and is rich when compared to people with lots of debt and no job.

Betty asked Vicky, “What do we do? Should we knock on his door and ask him to sleep with one of us?”

Vicky replied, “Will the answer be yes? Isn’t he supposed to be gay?”

“I’m not sure he’s gay. Sometimes, I’ve seen him staring at us, but he’s always been too shy to talk to us.”

“It’s cold out. We don’t have anywhere to stay, and his home looks warm.”

Betty said, “Maybe we can convince him to sleep with both of us and let us stay the night.”

Vicky replied, “Maybe we can convince him to sleep with both of us and let us stay lots of nights. If he’s shy, he may be very happy to have two cute girls like us be interested in him—interested enough to do what most long-time girlfriends do with long-time boyfriends. If he doesn’t want to sleep with us, the most we can get from him is some money and maybe a place to stay one night. But if we can get him to sleep with us, we may have a place to stay as long as we like, assuming that we keep him interested in us. Remember: gay or straight, men like bl*wj*bs. Let me do most of the talking, and you follow my lead. And remember, one or both of us must have sex with him very, very quickly.”

Product Details

BN ID: 2940045040808
Publisher: David Bruce
Publication date: 10/22/2012
Sold by: Smashwords
Format: NOOK Book
Sales rank: 461,623
File size: 159 KB
Age Range: 18 Years

About the Author

I would like to see my retellings of classic literature used in schools, so I give permission to the country of Finland (and all other countries) to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. I also give permission to the state of Texas (and all other states) to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. I also give permission to all teachers to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. Teachers need not actually teach my retellings. Teachers are welcome to give students copies of my eBooks as background material. For example, if they are teaching Homer’s “Iliad” and “Odyssey,” teachers are welcome to give students copies of my “Virgil’s ‘Aeneid’: A Retelling in Prose” and tell students, “Here’s another ancient epic you may want to read in your spare time.” I also write collections of anecdotes; most of the anecdotes are funny or at least interesting, while some provoke thinking. Libraries, download my books free. This is from Smashwords' FAQ section: "Does Smashwords distribute to libraries? "Yes! We have two methods of distributing to libraries: 1. Via library aggregators. Library aggregators, such as OverDrive and Baker & Taylor's Axis360 service, allow libraries to purchase books. Smashwords is working with multiple library aggregators, and is in the process of signing up additional aggregators. 2. On August 7, 2012, Smashwords announced Library Direct. This distribution option allows libraries and library networks to acquire and host Smashwords ebooks on their own servers. This option is only available to libraries who place large "opening collection" orders, typically in the range of $20,000-$50,000, and the libraries must have the ability to host and manage the books, and apply industry-standard DRM to manage one-checkout-at-a-time borrows. To learn more about these library distribution options, visit your Dashboard's Channel Manager." David Bruce is a retired anecdote columnist at "The Athens News" in Athens, Ohio. He has also retired from teaching English at Ohio University in Athens, Ohio.

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