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What Astrology Reveals About Your Child's Personality And Potential
By Sherrynne Dalby
Allen & UnwinCopyright © 2009 Sherrynne Dalby
All rights reserved.
Your child's potential
Your child's horoscope can reveal many things that will give you a head start from the moment of your child's birth. Why do some babies need lots of physical contact, while others don't enjoy being held tightly? Why do some children go to bed and straight to sleep every night, while others are still wide awake long after you are ready for bed? Why are some kids easygoing and have no problem making friends, while others prefer their own company? Your child's horoscope answers these questions and more. As well as showing possible areas of conflict or difficulty for your child, their horoscope also provides solutions, so you can put in place strategies to help overcome problems before or as they arise.
It's much easier to be a better and more informed parent and to know how to protect and nurture your child when you understand what's best for them. Through your child's horoscope a trained astrologer can see at a glance if your child is more likely to have allergies or susceptibility to other health issues. They can also see if your child is likely to have fears or phobias, and how and when these are likely to manifest. Just as your child's genes will determine the colour of their eyes, skin or hair, so their birth chart shows personality characteristics, what type of activities they prefer, even their food preferences.
As you will see, astrology gives us wonderful insights into the various stages of childhood development and why these stages occur when they do. Most people have heard of the 'terrible twos', for example, but Star Parenting explains why this occurs at the age of two and not three or four. Why do babies become 'clingy' at around six months and why do some children find socialising so easy while others have so much difficulty in this area? These quesions are all answered in commonsense and easy-to-understand language that puts you in the position of knowing rather than wondering.
You will also gain insights about yourself as a parent. Why does one child always seem to know which buttons to push? Why does it seem easier or harder to relate to particular children? With Star Parenting you will understand more about psychological motivators and how to work with them. These insights will help you improve your parenting skills, create a better relationship with your child and put your son or daughter on the path that will unlock their hidden potential. Wouldn't it be great to know from the time your child was very young the career path they will be most suited to, and to be able to put the right tools at their fingertips from a young age? With Star Parenting you will be in a much more informed position to do just that. Whether your child is a potential artist, scientist, teacher, lawyer, musician or plumber, you will be able to provide them with activities that will suit their needs.
I have been at the births of all of my grandchildren. As I was aware of where the planets were during each labour, I was able to predict the major characteristics of my grandchildren even before they were born. I was able to tell my daughter, Caitlin, that her baby girl would be a fussy feeder, so she didn't feel a failure when breastfeeding proved difficult. As a result, Caitlin was able to utilise feeding practices that suited her daughter's individual needs. Olivia is now a happy four-year-old with a healthy appetite. Too often, parents experience feelings of guilt and failure when there is a problem. But rather than failing to be a 'good' parent, it is usually simply a case of not understanding their child's needs.
Astrology is brilliant at helping parents fill in the gaps. It's not surprising that astrology is so helpful; it is the oldest science known to man. Most of our 'modern' sciences developed from the study of the heavens. The ancients living in Mesopotamia created the longest continuous record of scientific observation in human history, spanning several thousand years. Their observations not only plotted the movement of heavenly bodies but also recorded daily the events that coincided with these movements: as above, so below. The modern astrologer draws on over four thousand years of accumulated learning when interpreting the position of the Earth and other planets at any given moment in time, for example, in the birth horoscope.
Coming from a large family and myself the mother of seven children, I have had plenty of experience with family dynamics and how different individual children can be. But it wasn't until I began a study of astrology that I gained the insights I had been missing. Knowing the nuances of your child's personality traits, their individual potential, and the timing of their stages of development is something all parents struggle with, and astrology provides the key to understanding.
For example, you probably wouldn't be aware that your child's ability to communicate — when they will utter their first word, and so on — is connected with the movement of the planet Mercury in their chart. The development of motor skills — when your child takes their first steps — is related to the planet Mars, while specific likes and dislikes can be traced to the placement of Venus and the Moon at the time of their birth.
Star Parenting goes into much greater depth than the popular Sun sign — more commonly called star sign — astrology. In fact, it will plainly show you why your child may not be, say, a typical Aries or Taurus. It will instead show you who they really are.
One of the criticisms levelled at astrology is that it only uses one of twelve Sun signs to describe an individual's personality. In fact, each person's horoscope is a unique combination of Sun, Moon and the other eight planets in our solar system. Simply by adding the Moon sign to the Sun sign we go from twelve to 144 possible 'personality types'. When we add the other planets, such complex combinations are created that it makes each moment in time unique; the horoscope for a birth can never be repeated.
The advantage of astrology over any of the 'personality' tests is that it offers a clear map for our life course, from the moment we draw our first breath. You, the parent, will have this advantage: knowing and understanding your child's predisposition, you can create a world that will nurture and encourage them in safety and comfort.
You will be able to clearly discern their different developmental stages and why these occur at different times, understanding that each child operates on their own schedule. In a fast-moving, constantly changing world, Star Parenting offers you the tools to work with your child in a relaxed and easy manner, helping them achieve their full potential in life.CHAPTER 2
What kind of parent are you?
Before we get to know your child's horoscope, it's useful to know where your own strengths and weaknesses lie in the area of parenting. So take a look at the following section to see where you are at. How you react as a parent will also depend on what sign your child is. Knowing the possibilities and potential flashpoints will help you be the best mum or dad possible.
The Aries Parent
Being under the rulership of the planet Mars, Aries embodies the fiery characteristics of the red planet. It is also a fire sign and of the cardinal or initiating quality. Arians are active by nature, and this includes their parenting style. As initiators, this is what they do best, leaving the finishing to someone else. The Aries parent takes to parenting in the same way as they approach anything in life: head-on. As Aries can themselves be very childlike, they generally relate quite well to children. As parents, they actively encourage their children to be involved in physical pastimes. Like the Aries child, they can be quick to flare up, but just as quickly let anger go.
The Aries father can be a little overbearing, leading by example rather than words. More sensitive children can feel intimidated and this dad needs to learn to read the signals coming from his children. However, he will be warm and affectionate to his children, and enjoy being an active participant in their lives. He can be a little like a supplanted older sibling when a new baby first arrives, and still needs to feel he is important to his partner. There can be a tendency with the Aries father to not know when too much of a good thing is harmful, such as a tickle match just before bedtime. Try to keep the more exuberant play for before bath- or dinnertime and try more gentle play or a bedtime story just before bed.
The Aries mother doesn't mollycoddle her children. Taking care of the practicalities, she expects a certain level of independence and self-sufficiency in her children and is not overly fussy. She will be a firm disciplinarian, expecting obedience. She will teach her children to believe in magic and fairytales, and she will enjoy walking in her child's fantasy. Like the Aries father, this mother needs to be aware that her sometimes brash manner can be upsetting to her more sensitive children, in particular those born under the water signs.
The challenge for Aries parents is to remember that they are the parent, as sometimes they can behave more like the child. Aries parents should endeavour to curb some of the Aries impulsiveness, which can be unnerving to the more sensitive child or the child who likes predictability and routine. Join your children in their fantasy and creative play but remember to set the boundaries and keep them. Your children will look to you for guidance and reassurance as they grow. Encourage their independence but don't push them too soon. Try to have some sort of routine, even if it is only a loose one.
The Taurus Parent
Taurus is under the rulership of Venus, the planet associated with love and sensuality. It is also of the element earth and a fixed sign. This gives Taurus a reputation for stability, or, in the eyes of some, stubbornness. Calm and solid: this is the Taurean, until something or someone gets them riled. Taurus enjoys the simple comforts of life, good food, the peace of the countryside, a warm bed and lots of hugs. Generally a homebody, they fall into the role of parenthood without too much fuss, as long as they are able to preserve a semblance of their normal routine.
The Taurus father will be openly loving and patient and willing to spend time teaching their child anything he feels is important, and a lot of these lessons will revolve around the need for security. He administers discipline firmly but fairly. It takes a lot to rile this parent and others may be amazed at the restraint he shows when trying to instil respect and tolerance into his offspring. There can be a tendency to rule with an iron fist and be inflexible. He will be warm and sympathetic when needed but also able to give sound practical advice.
The Taurus mother is in her element with the baby and toddler in her life but may have difficulty when that cute cuddly little being turns into the hormone-fuelled teenager. Partly due to her love of beauty and peace, the Taurus mother can be too strict and demanding. She expects her children to be obedient, and can become the angry bull if she feels her discipline is being thwarted. She will not tolerate laziness in her children and gives them a strong sense of responsibility.
The challenge for the Taurean parent is to rise above the natural inclination to be overcautious and overprotective of their children. It is also important to learn flexibility and that there can be other perspectives outside yours. Allow your children some freedom; otherwise they can feel they are being suffocated.
The Gemini Parent
Being a mutable air sign, under the governorship of Mercury, Gemini is a social and an intellectual sign. This creates a tendency to spend a lot of time 'in the head'. Gemini parents are great at coming up with answers but the tendency to avoid emotional situations can leave their children feeling emotionally abandoned. Geminis tend to express their ever-present 'inner child' when interacting with children, and the Gemini parent ensures their child has access to any number of extracurricular activities but can feel totally at a loss when faced with their child's emotional demands. Socially conscious, they will entertain the neighbourhood, but may fall down in providing one-on-one time with their own child.
The Gemini father does not generally make a good disciplinarian and although he is unlikely to lose his temper physically, his natural cutting wit can do serious damage to the developing young ego of his child. Consistency is something Geminis can have a problem with, yet children need consistency in order to feel secure. Dad will be in his element being a big kid with his children and will be quite happy to get on the floor and play and help his children to be relaxed with themselves. At the same time, though, he needs to be able to provide them with stability and security.
The Gemini mother also relishes the fun side of parenthood. She will instil a sense of independence into her brood but they may feel a lack of stability. This mother will be concerned with her child's academic achievements but needs to guard against this being the only way her child can gain her approval. She can spend hours lost in imagination and play with her children, encouraging their minds to expand, which can also be helpful for bonding. But it is equally important to give them a routine and security.
The challenge for the Gemini parent is to be consistent with discipline and responsibility. The natural tendency is to be fluid and changeable, but children need firm boundaries and security. Consistency offers children security.
The Cancer Parent
Cancer is a cardinal water sign and under the rulership of the Moon. The Cancerian is the natural sign of mother and home and, as such, generally makes a caring, if somewhat unpredictable, parent. Good humour and a wonderful ability to mimic make them fun parents. Sensitive both to their own and others' needs, Cancerians are generally concerned for the wellbeing of those they care about. As a parent they can be controlling, born from their own fears. 'Don't climb that tree; you might fall', is a likely response to the sight of their child attempting independence and expanding their horizons.
The Cancer father is caring, gentle and sympathetic, has a great sense of humour and enjoys the opportunity to play. Even the local kids will beat a path to his door. He is proud and fiercely protective of his children, ultimately patient and is genuinely concerned for their wellbeing. The problems manifest with this father when the children get older and begin to show their independence. Cancer needs to be needed. His love and concern, while admirable, can be seen as controlling by his children. The art is to find that fine line and not step over it too often.
The Cancer mother creates a warm and comfortable environment for her children. She may not be the neatest housekeeper, but the home will always be welcoming, with wonderful aromas emanating from the kitchen as she tempts her brood with her latest culinary efforts. The Cancer mother tends to resort to comfort-feeding to solve all ills and this can result in an overfed child physically and a mother who is overly manipulative or clingy when it comes to her children. Emotional manipulation can be the price for comfort.
The challenge for Cancer parents is to move beyond their own fear base and allow their child some freedom. It is important to allow the child to develop into his or her own person and eventually to leave the safety and comfort of the nest.
The Leo Parent
Leo is a fixed fire sign, ruled by the Sun. As the Sun is the centre of the solar system, many Leos also consider themselves to be the centre, around which everything else revolves. Like their animal namesake, the Leo parent will defend his or her young to the death. Leos take great pride in their children and woe betide any outsider who dares attack them. When they become parents they are warm and loving without smothering their children, generally encouraging them to be independent.
The Leo father demands respect from his children but does not make a very good disciplinarian. Again, look to the animal namesake; it is the lioness who is responsible for the raising of the offspring, while the male lies around demanding the adoration of his pride. He can be a fun dad, affectionate and adoring, but is too easily manipulated — especially by his daughters, who will have his measure early on, knowing that the right flattery will almost guarantee them what they want.
The Leo mother will be the disciplinarian and can often quieten her rowdy brood with just a look. She will frolic with her children and give love generously. She is not always able to clearly see the faults in her children, but when she does she is very strict and expects obedience. She will also demand certain standards to be kept, especially in public. Even though she is firm, she is also generous and can go overboard with little luxuries. This mother would protect her children with her life but does not smother them, keeping an eye on them from a safe distance, ready to pounce if the need arises.
Excerpted from Star Parenting by Sherrynne Dalby. Copyright © 2009 Sherrynne Dalby. Excerpted by permission of Allen & Unwin.
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Table of Contents
Your child's potential,
What kind of parent are you?,
How you relate to your child,
Children of their generation,
Your baby's first years,
School and beyond,
Your child's personality,
A little more on personality types,